our favourite things.

Monday, June 30, 2008

When troubled by strange voices
When disturbed by scattered noises
When the white of eyes turn blue
I will be there for you

Do not have any fear
For I am always near
Shed no more tears
Feel no more pain
Talk to Me and call My immaculate name

Hold on to the pleasant memories
Let go of the troubled past
For each time that you fall
My undying love for you will conquer all

You are my child
And I care
Have faith and I will always be there

Together, we can ride this storm
Overcome, preserve and your sorrow will be gone
My love for you continues to
You know I will stand by you through thick and thin
This temporary setback will be over soon
Then on your face,I will delighted to see that lovely grin

-extract from Anthony Fernando

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always at your call.

Saturday, June 28, 2008

Hmm, not feeling really good today. Oh well, nothing really major happened. Somehow, people just started to run through my mind. People whom I used to be close with, people whom I used to care so much and now we went separate ways. I miss them. I really do. Many times I cried, feeling, probably I don't care enough, probably I was never there for them.
I know they do miss those times together, I know they want the past to relive. But pride just simply gets in the way and eat in that nostalgia. Ended up, none of them wanted to be truthful of their true feelings.
I know how difficult it is to be someone we ought to be. But why can't we get through all these together? Why leave? Is that the best solution by running away?
I really miss them. How badly I wanted them to be back.
It doesn't matter if the cell still bother their existence and significance, because I bother; I care. They probably wouldn't know that desperation and that longing for them to be back.
But it lives right inside me. And no matter how things, situations changes, I'll still be waiting for them to come back.
And I believe that pride never should get in the way of our friendship.

I love you guys. I will be welcoming you guys back the way God would embrace you with tender love and care.

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Friday, June 27, 2008

AAARGHH! WILLIAM MOSELEY!!!!!!!!! Ok fine, i took this from luwei's blog! he is awfully cute!
Thanks Luwei! HAHA.=D

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MUG. MUG. MUG. MUG. And O's Chinese oral is on MONDAY! MONDAY!!! Arrghh. Save me, someone please call the ambulance! I seriously hope I die before O's.
But Shannon reminded me that I haven't got married, so I somehow shoved off that thought. Hmm, but come to think of it now, does it matter if I will get married? Actually, nay. I don't really care if I will get married.
Only if my husband will still write love letters to me even when we are married; he will do facial for me probably once in two weeks and maybe even manicure and padicure. And of course he will still surprise me here and there with gifts and dates. Ahahas. Ok, that's so a 'tai-tai' life. Alright. Alright. Good night! =)

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If love didn't exist...

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

If love didn’t exist, I could have got angry with all the people I want and even let it builds to hatred.
If love didn’t exist, I would let hatred influence my actions.
If love didn’t exist, I could spew all sorts of vulgarities on the people I hate.
If love didn’t exist, I would judge and gossip.
If love didn’t exist, I would have taken revenge on whomever gets on my back and it would be double, triple of more of the pain and hurt I got.
If love didn’t exist, I could backstab, betray, cheat, lie and not feel any sense of guilt; but feel a sense of satisfaction.
If love didn’t exist, I would have led a life based on my appearance and status.
If love didn’t exist, I could drink, smoke, drugged, and done all sorts of harmful things to my body.
If love didn’t exist, I would not take up that responsibility of my own life.
If love didn’t exist, life is a trash.
If love didn’t exist, all I knew was to live for and by myself.
If love didn’t exist, loneliness and emptiness is my friend.
If love didn’t exist, I would get hurt and hurt others.
If love didn’t exist, I would always be chasing after the world which is a never-ending road.
If love didn’t exist, I would be wallowing in self pity; drowning in sorrows and bitterness.
And if love didn’t exist, my God wouldn’t exist.

Love wasn’t anything at all until my God showed up. Love wasn’t that great and beautiful until He showed up.
Love exists when God created the heavens and the earth which was once formless and empty.
Love exists when God separated darkness and light.
Love exists when God created the sky, the sea, the ground.
Love exists when God created all sorts of creatures; from those that swims to those that flies.
And love exists when God created man in His own image and likeness and let us rule over everything on earth.
Love exists when God created every man in their own ways; so beautiful and so special.
Yet sin destroyed that beauty of man.
Love continues to exist when God sent His one and only son to die on the cross for the sins of man and allow a direct access to have a relationship with Him.
Love exists even till today no matter how corrupted and polluted the world is, for our Father God exists.

Love is just another action until God displays it to His capacity that no man can ever fully express and explain that depth of it.
That love God gave was so much, so consuming, so pure that it can never be simplified just by that four letter word, “love”. It is God. Love is God. And if God didn’t exist, how would love exist? And if love didn’t exist, how would I exist?

1 Corinthians 13: 1-2,"If I speak in the tongues of men and angels, but not love, I'm only a resounding gong or clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have faith that can move mountains, but not love, I am nothing"

I'm nothing without God for He is love.

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Mugging period.

Sunday, June 22, 2008

Alright. School is starting. And I'm not prepared; not prepared for tests, not prepared for prelims, definitely not prepared for O's. For the next three months, it's gonna be so different. It's the real thing. The real stress, the real pressure, the real moment.
I know I 've been playing really hard for my June holidays and I didn't study much except for returning to school for extra lessons. Hmm, I'm really gonna give it all this three months. No more outings, no more phone-jamming, no more net surfing, no more movies marathon, no more slacking!!! Ok, I'm really getting serious here cos I'm really freaking out. I really wanna do well for O's. I don't wanna land myself in somewhere not meant to be. And I know even during this stressing and mugging three months, it's gonna be so taxing on me, but God is there and He shall be my motivation to study. There will be break downs and definitely times when I wanna give up, but God is there and I wanna lift up this period to Him. I will continue to be faithful and prayerful. Yeap.
Thanks to those people who prayed for me and I really thank God for you guys.

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Specially for you.

Saturday, June 21, 2008

Hey ADE! This is for you. You're leaving Australia soon. And I wanna take this opportunity to express my gratitude to you.

You've been an awesome leader, an understanding sister, an approachable friend. You've seen my ups and downs and you really really never fail to make me feel so loved and special.

From the moment I got to know you from camp to the moment I joined cafe, you've walked me through a meaningful and memorable journey. And this journey is something that can never be bought by anything. I really thank God for such a leader, a sister, a friend.

Even through the darkest moments of my life, you were there to care, not to judge; to listen, not to scold; to love, not to condemn; to pray, not to dictate. And all these mean so much to me.

Let alone words can never fully express that gratitude towards you.

Sometimes I wish, you could step into my shoes for just a little while,

To think what I think; to see what I see; to feel what I feel;

To understand the confusion,the fear, the admiration and friendship

I feel towards you all at once.

If you were able to live inside my mind, even for a moment.

You would see that my world is filled with so many responsibilities,

Yet so often my thoughts are of you.

You would see how much it means to be able to smile, to laugh, to feel good,

To feel free like a child because of you.

If you had the chance to take the smallest glimpse inside of me,

You would see gratitude and respect.

Respect not only for what you are making of yourself;

But also for what you are helping me to be.

And you would see how much all of that mean to me.

But one thing that would strike you most is,

If you ever had the chance to be me,

You would feel all the love I feel for you.

And once you had felt it, you would always remember it, and understand that

Although I am unable to express it or explain its depth and importance to you.

It's always there, inside of me.

I know you remembered this. And even as you're leaving for Australia, I'm happy for you as this is a great opportunity. You'll be meeting new people, going to different places and enjoying all kinds of new experiences. But part of me is sad too. I'll miss having you so close, being able to talk, to laugh and cry with you. Yet even though I'll miss you, I'll always be thinking of you. And wishing you good because nothing but the best is good enough for someone as special as you.

Some photos to bring back those times.

We climbed the pyramid and raided Tommy's house.

Kohwei. Me. Dawanlin. YOU!

A family picture without flash.

A family picture with flash. Ok, I'm being lame.

Oh man, rosaline look funny! And I look wild!

HAHA. The wild times after cafe. Whoohoo!

We played pool. And I was bad.

My birthday surprise!

YOU. Kohwei

Pinfen. Me. You.

Pinfen advertising for fried-fish beehoon soup.

Pinfen imitating 'mouth-opened' brother of mine during sermon. HAHA

My mouth is full and Tommy is taking my food!

snipshot!

The unglam photo if Rachel! ahhas.

Aww, look at those food! And Tommy actually paid for that!

The wedding?!! AHAHAHA. Ok, inside joke.

Daryl and his wannabe pose.

The next phua chu kang! HAHA.

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Thursday, June 19, 2008

This is really funny. *chuckles* *chuckles*

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SHANNON

Ok. I'm really bored. I'm not studying and I'm not doing anything and I'm still deciding whether to go study with Shannon. And she's reminding me that O's is only three months away. Ok. Tell you something about Shannon. She loves GREEN TEA. And I don't like it coz it has indian smell. (I'm not being racist) But she said that the smell is due to the jasmine tea leaves. Hmm, it's still indian smell to me. Ok, and Shannon? You should like go away from her. Coz she got a disease. And that is she LOVES to take photos of her own injuries. What's the problem with her right? ahahaha. She likes spongebob and I like patrick and that makes us good friends. HAHA. And she only eats KOKA cup noodles. A petty person yes i know. Oh well, she laughs at me and sometimes I laugh at her. Ok, that's super random. And yes, she loves her big, wavy, curly hair which do not need much of combing and care. And she loves watches coz she watches? *hysterical laughters* . Ok, that didn't make sense at all.
Alright, that's the random stuffs about Shannon.
Psst, Shannon. This is for you while talking to you on the phone. HAHA.

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Mandarin struggle or culture struggle?

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Hmm. Somehow, I just can't get over Chinese though chinese O's are over. I know it definitely wouldn't be an A. But somehow, I'm hoping for an A2 at least. It's quite demoralising to do really badly for my previous few chinese papers and even oral. I simply can't imagine I did so badly for oral. I could see from the teacher, trying to strain her ears to understand a 'foreign' language. But I'm pretty convinced that I was speaking mandarin. I felt so horrible and disabled in a way to be unable to speak fluent mandarin when others are handling more than two languages.
My mom is pretty good at both languages(english & mandarin). She was shocked that I couldn't read off those simple Chinese characters from an advertisement and got more worried that I had problems conversing mandarin with my grandma. That was so bad.
And my inability to handle two languages, especially my mother tongue disturbed me so much and trigger some thoughts in me.
Spore education system has been trying so hard to get us more English-educated and everything is taught in English. We speak English everyday. And the only times when I actually use mandarin was in Chinese lessons and when conversing with hawkers outside, assuming they don't understand English. Somehow, many fall into thinking that knowing & speaking english is not just ain't a language, they wanted to be part of that culture too. And that's generally the America culture many s'poreans are trying to sink in.
People didn't realise certain things that the americans believed in is a total far-fetch to what we Asians believed in. Just taking of the values we hold is already a big difference. And many people embraced their culture and totally throw away their real identity as an asian, as a chinese. And that totally pissed me off.
Yes, though I can't handle my chinese language well, but I will never go to the extent of throwing away my traditional culture as a chinese. We keep talking about learning others' culture, but yet sometimes unknowingly, we became part of that culture. I'm proud of being a chinese and I'm pretty sure of my race. And of coz, I will try my best to improve my chinese! HAHA.
So stop trying to be part of others' culture cause there's definitely a purpose God made you an Asian. Just a thought for a day. Aye.

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amazing race for my amazing God.

Sunday, June 15, 2008

Ok. For gladys & olivia, I will post about the amazing race. First and foremost, it was indeed AMAZING! haha. Yes, it was. I really learn a lot through this race, not just the physical but also, spiritually. I was under Jonathan and he really made a great & caring leader. Thanks Jona! We went to bukit batok nature reserve first and it was already a killer with the hill to almost 45 degrees steep. Funniest was that the challenge was so easy. The challenge was about history and Rachel, a newcomer is able to memorise those facts as eugene went on with his babbles. Oh man, she's really good! Alright. Our next station is IMM aka International Merchandise Mall. HAHA. The usage of short form is too often that no one seem to know what's International Merchandise Mall. *hsyterical laughters* Oh well, they got to IMM and were searching for a girl bridage who turn out to be CharmaineBay! I was pretty relieved to see her, probably hoping for her give us some leeway. Done the challenge and moved on to the next station which is at Toh Guan Road East. And the place is very industralised. However, when we went in, there was a rock climbing facilities which is so out of place! My gosh, these people are really great at finding such places. Alright. Next stop is clementi woods which is the toughest I think. It has a total of three stations. The slope was our last. And it was the most amusing thing! We were all dirty and disgusting. But it was really fun! haha. Tiring but good!

Overall, this amazing race allow me to learn a lot. Through this, I realise how important team work is. And how this race isn't exactly about the fun and games, but the fellowship with my cell and God. Through this race, our team prayed quite often. Praying for the buses to come, praying for waiting time to shorten, praying for strength to get through the next station, praying for quite almost everything. And God did answer our prayers. Ok, it sounded like mission trip. HAHA. This race was tough, we had to overcome that physical barrier and really doing something out of the normal but we get through and finish it. Yes, though I was dying to win those vouchers, but still it was all for God. And as a team, we know everyone did their best. Likewise,in the race for God, it's tough-going but yet it was worthwhile cause we know our God is a loving and gracious God who will never leave us for the second best, the biggest gift He promised when we finish our race with Him and for Him, was eternal life. And that's already more than enough.
Oh yes, and thank you games comm for those games, especially Micbay! haha. I know those sleepless nights yea Micbay?

Labels: Hey Gladys and Oli, I love you enough to spend half an hour to blog this

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Start Off

I created this blog. Many people come and go, and yet most of the time they are people who walked such wonderful journeys with me in my life. I want this blog to be recorded of the beautiful memories God has blessed me with. Sometimes, I would bump into a long lost friend whom I lost contact with for a long long time, and the first thing that friend would ask is, "Hey, how have you been?" So many things to say, but yet most of the time the only reply I can manage was only a word like, "Great", "Fine".
Hopefully, through this blog, friends who went separate ways will be able to get to know how
I'm doing in life with God, with studies, with ministries, with friends. Most importantly, I want this blog to be a spiritual journal which I can grow from and even a closer walk with God. I remembered someone telling me of how putting thoughts into words will allow a better view to situations, probably better understanding, and rather less consuming. Usually words are better connection to the hearts of people. And i very much like to share this journal or a blog you called it to my fellow family and friends.

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