As you get older, depression gets old too. And you realize, "You know what? Fuck it. I'd rather not give a shit and enjoy life"
- Glory Szabo
At times I think that I've been the worst shit ever. I think of revenge. I want to see you go through everything I've gone through. No wait, I want to see double the agony you've inflicted on me. I believe I need to see that suffering in your pathetic eyes to feel good. It seems to be the only way to break loose of all the mourning cells in me - I guess some would say it to have a cathartic effect. And revenge, it is the only way to get my life back.
But when I take a deeper glance in your eyes, I see a reflection of myself. I have to say, I do not like what I see. It is filled with past tense. And I realize, I'm merely living in your past - a sad bitter one. It isn't life at all, chasing after your bitterness & pathetic sobs. At least it isn't the life I want to see myself in.
Because, I know I'm made to love. The love that spills from my heart and covers everything like a blanket. A love that can explode in people and create entire universes.
And I will enjoy my life to the fullest. That itself is the reward I deserve, and the best revenge I can get.
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