"I'm not a born actress, as such, I care about expressing feelings." -Audrey Hepburn

Many times I care too much about feelings and feelings make up my whole world for me. It makes me wonder whether the world I'm living in is the real one. Cause I feel surreal in my own delusion more than anywhere else.

I want to play a grand piano on some gorgeous stage with a million audience.
I want to learn as many instruments as possible; saxophone will be next.
I want to dive in a swimming pool-sized of chocolate fondue.
I want a field flooded with orange daisies.
I want to teleport to Berklee!
I want a library of books with classics, and very very very extremely good books & novels.
I want to own a home movie theatre with my very own ice cream fridge.
I want to direct my own gore movie and write my own gore novel. (this is thrilling.)
I want to get married to some rich guy and be a tai tai. HAH.

@ lolalimlumlabe_92@hotmail.com

Adina Amanda Amethyst Chenchen Esthergoh Estherlee Fionalim Gladys Jono Kennethleow Rachel Yijun Yuhong

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PLEASE DO NOT REMOVE % Pictures: Photobucket
% Brushes/Fonts: Henri Eshita
% designer: Weannz
% Basecode: Weannz

Hello readers. You know, I really wonder how many actually bother to read this space. I thought of having those domino counters to find out how many readers I have. At the same time, I fear that it's so pathetic that no one actually gives a shit about me.

Yea, maybe I'm suffering from inferiority complex. But I guess everyone gets that at some point in their lives. Then again, what if this is going to taunt me for the rest of my life?

I'm considering to move to tumblr. Blogspot is fine. But most users of tumblr are so soul-reflective and sorrowful. And I feel deeply connected with em as my own emotions begin pouring out. Another reason why I wanna move to tumblr is to get rid of haters so I can be brutally honest. Honest of who I am so I don't get judged & mocked, not honest in the bitching sort.

I'm feeling so beleaguered. Feeling so unloved and unwanted. I just wish for someone who could love me just as much as he wishes he could and he would gather some courage to do so. It is painful to love someone so helplessly. It's as if I'm driving on a one-way path with no junctions, no traffic lights, and definitely no U-turns. There's no point of return. Even if my heart is heavy w regrets & ache, I can never diverge to a new path.

To you, love is a game show. It doesn't matter who wins or loses, as long as you had your own share of fun. But love to me is a reality show. It's about hopes and dreams. And when you leave, it's as if you trampled over those hopes and dreams which are carefully knitted specially for you. That feeling of being shattered and fragmented, shamefully stripped apart makes me wonder if I can ever feel whole again.

When the heart takes charge, what is rationality? ****************