School starts tomorrow! Technically today. But oh well. I sound excited but seriously, check that tone. !! It's more like panic attack.
My head hurts. I toss and turn in bed. I feel my soul was lifted out of me for once where I am brought into a whole new dimension, one where I've a resolution in life.
My body is weak and I feel extremely weary. It feels as if I'm carrying this huge metal over my head and I have chains attached to me. My neck aches and my eyelids feel heavy. There are voices within that keeps interjacking each other. Inside me keeps churning and twinging. My eyes are barely open, my vision is blurred and the only thing in front of me is this ray of light. I feel that tinge of urge to walk towards it. I grope my way along those dim lamps. Using every ounce of strength that my body can produce, I push my feet forward. Step by step, I told myself. I propel myself out of darkness, together with those lamps that guide my feet to that light. Finally I thought, a resolution. A stop to all the turmoil. It is as if I can smell peace.
I jerked out of bed. I'm back in my room. I'm hanging onto the unfinished resolution.
Was this even a resolution? I don't make any sense of what I write. But if you do understand this piece of writing, you are probably as insane as me.
I think the song that best describe my mood and it happens to be my favourite song - Breathing, Lifehouse.
Goodnight.
I'm finding my way back to sanity, again. Though I don't really know
what I'm gonna do when I get there. Take a breath and hold on tight.
Spin around one more time. And gracefully fall back in the arms of grace.
I am hanging on every word you say. And even if you don't want to
speak tonight. That's alright, alright with me. Cause I want nothing
more than to sit outside Heaven's door and listen to you breathing,
Is where I want to be.
I am looking past the shadows of my mind into the truth and
I'm trying to identify the voices in my head, God, which one's you?
Let me feel one more time what it feels like to feel.
And break these calluses off me one more time.
Breathing - Lifehouse.
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